The Difference Christ Makes
In Your Subconscious Mind

Your conscious and subconscious make up the whole of your mind. One cannot be intelligently considered without the other.

   One directly influences the other.

   It is really a closed circuit.

   Fears and worry and self-consciousness and unrest plague the conscious mind, but they are stored in the subconscious!

   It has been helpful to me to realize that our subconscious minds are like baskets. Into them is dropped everything that passes through our conscious minds!

   This is a terrifying thought.

   But it is true. Everything we say, hear, think or act upon "drops," as it were, into the basket of the subconscious. What a ghastly state of confusion and distortion and ugliness and sin must prevail in our subconscious minds! But we might as well face it. We can control our conscious minds, and by discipline and association and memory, bring some manner of order to them. But except as we control what drops into

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our subconscious minds, we have no active means of controlling them.

   And to add to this seemingly tragic state of things, we are said to be nine-tenths subconscious. Like an iceberg, we are mostly "under water." When we turn to Jesus Christ and determine with our conscious minds to follow Him, only one tenth of us has turned!

   We perceive something of His truth and His way of life and our conscious minds fall under His influence. The degree to which they show this influence depends upon our sincerity and willingness, but it also depends upon the length of time our conscious thought patterns have been formed.

   If a man has been running to a bottle to try to escape from his problems for twenty years, he will seldom break this pattern at once. Mel Trotter, the great mission man of his time, was known to have been intoxicated at least seven times after his conversion to Christ, before the pattern of the years was finally broken.

   It is one of the great tragedies of Christendom for us to judge the authenticity of a conversion experience by the length of time required to replace the old patterns by new ones. This is superficial thinking and shows a complete lack of knowledge of how the conscious mind works.

   Granted, then, that however long it may take, the conscious mind does in some degree begin to show a change from the old way to the new, upon conversion to Jesus Christ, what happens in the subconscious?

   We have said that it is like a basket. When God takes over the human mind at conversion, He takes over the subconscious with all its frightening contents. He would be less than God if He did not.

   I can only thank Him for being the kind of God He is, when I remember the chaos of my own subconscious mind when I became a Christian. Actually, I hadn't given my subconscious

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a thought in the beginning. I was too excited with the new, shining concepts which were crowding into my conscious mind.

   But as the weeks passed by, I began to be haunted during the day by the dreams I experienced at night. My conscious mind was made up. I wanted to follow Jesus Christ. I wanted to belong to Him. I wanted Him to belong to me.

   But my subconscious mind evidently hadn't heard the news of my conversion!

   I would dream at night of my old life, of the friends I had loved so much, of the best of the high points in a life which had been spent in the pursuit of success and pleasure. I would awaken, restless and disturbed. On those days I didn't want to read the Bible or pray. And the temptation to run back to the dear, old familiar ways began to take hold of my conscious mind. The dreams came from my subconscious. But my conscious mind paid the price. They are both a part of the whole.

   As with almost every new Christian, now and then I would question whether "anything had really happened to me" at all! But fortunately I was not persuaded to become a Christian because of a process called salvation or a promise of a thrilling experience. I was persuaded to become a Christian because Jesus Christ, Himself, was help up to me. And so I went straight to Him with the problem of my dreams.

   One of the first things I was told about Him was that He loved me so much nothing was unimportant to Him where I was concerned. I believed this, simply, as a child believes things he is told and so I went to Him about my dreams. And I said something like this to Him: "Lord, I know that my subconscious mind is nine-tenths of me. And now that I believe You created me, You must have created my subconscious, too. And if You did, then You know I don't have any control over it. I know I have dropped many, many wrong

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things down into it through the years when I didn't know You even existed. But there's nothing I can do about that now. What can You do? I know You can do something about changing the very depths of my subconscious mind. And so, beginning tonight, I am going to make a conscious act of handing my subconscious over to You the very last thing before I go to sleep. And I'll do it every night. Will You please untangle it for me?"

   I did my part, and, of course, so did He.

   Almost at once my dreams began to show conflict! I might still dream the same things, but somewhere in the dream would be a new ingredient. A conflict of some kind because of Jesus Christ. Before I made that simple transaction with Him, the dreams had run the gamut of the old life, and I was in them as I had been before my conversion.

   No longer. From that time to this day, when and if I happen to dream of my old life in any way, I awaken with a smile. Sometimes I even laugh with relief at His determined invasion of my subconscious mind.

   A psychiatrist can dig things out of our subconscious minds and often just the seeing will release us wonderfully. But the best any competent psychiatrist can do is show us our trouble and advise us how to learn to live with it. I am thankful for all the men and women who offer this helpful service to humanity. As Christians we should urge Christian young people to enter the field. But most of us don't need a psychiatrist. And followers of Jesus Christ belong to the Great Psychiatrist. The One who created the human mind in the beginning.

   Allow this to enter your thought life once and for all: The Holy Spirit of God can — and wants to — change your subconscious mind. Perhaps this is the part of us in which His work is most effective! If you have received Christ as your Saviour, the Holy Spirit is already at work in your subconscious

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as well as your conscious mind. But it would appear that we greatly facilitate His work in the depths of our personalities when, with our conscious minds, we make a love offering to Him of all that we cannot control in ourselves.

   If your conscious thoughts are knotted and held by the fear of not being loved, of being a nobody, of expressing yourself, or if you seem to be held by even a nameless fear, a good psychiatrist could no doubt help you.

   And possibly your fear of not being loved, your basic fear-choked sense of insecurity can be traced to some unfortunate condition of your childhood or to some hard blow life has dealt you. Realizing this is a step in the right direction. But time after time, I have watched the Holy Spirit of God set free a fear-clogged mind simply by some direct contact with Jesus Christ Himself.

   If Christians are to go through their earthly lives still bound by fear and worry and anxiety patterns, then Jesus must have been wrong when He said, "I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly."

   Either He meant that or He did not.

   With many women who have spoken to me about their fears and worries, you may be reminding me in your thoughts that you have already received Jesus Christ as your Saviour. But still you are afraid.

   This was the situation with someone whom I will call Marian. I met her during a speaking engagement in a large eastern city. And of all the fearful and disturbed women with whom I have spoken, Marian was the most fearful. She was extremely intelligent. Her humor and her insight into things spiritual and secular interested me. But by her own admission she had poured out her problem to "dozens of leaders" of all faiths. For some reason psychiatry had not helped her either. Her physical condition showed the marks of her emotional

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battles. She was ill physically and emotionally. And she was being slowly frightened to death by life!

   The weeks passed and no help came to her. Then one night we met again in another city where I was speaking. Frankly, I was looking forward to her company but not to a discussion of her problems. I had heard it all by letter, over and over and over and over. She appeared to be locked permanently in a prison of fear. She seemed to want out, but nothing I said, nothing anyone else said, had helped. She had become a Christian several years before. But there she was sitting across the table from me in the hotel dining room that night still trembling and talking in wretched, painful circles.

   I asked to be excused for a half hour and went to my own room. I had prayed for her until I didn't know anything else to say to the Lord about her. And yet, there she was waiting for me to come to her room and help her! I went to Him again. "Lord, You've brought this evening about. You died for Marian and You died for me. I'm all out of things to say to her. I'm not a professional counselor. I'm tired, and I'm desperate, and so is she. Take over!"

   In her room a few minutes later, we began to talk. Immediately, her old patterns took over. "I want to be free. I do! I've tried. It just doesn't work with me. I know you're going to tell me that what has been working for Christians for almost two thousand years will work for me, too. You've already told me that you couldn't follow a God who would withhold His power from even one person! I know I can't be a special case. But here I am! Nothing helps."

   I started to try to tell her again about the fact of His presence. Suddenly I was stopped in the telling. And I found myself no longer talking to Marian at all. I was talking to Christ Himself.

   She had a block against what she called "regular prayer." Someone had tried to teach her to pray properly once and had

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snapped her fingers at Marian when she didn't "pray properly." Remembering her panic over this unfortunate event, I just sat there in the chair with my eyes open and spoke directly to Christ.

   "You're here, Lord. You said you would be when two or more are gathered together in Your Name. Marian and I are here in Your Name and we're stuck! Now, without any more formality, I'm going to melt down this strange resistance in Marian to Your love? Will You do it right now, Lord? This minute! Will you give her power to speak to You, too? Now."

   I looked at Marian. She was writhing and so tense I feared for her physical well-being. But I had just thrown the whole issue over onto Him and I determined to wait to see what He would do with this fear-bound child of His.

   In the same voice which I had used when I spoke to Him (an ordinary conversational voice) I said: "Marian, tell Him you love Him." She just looked at me and my heart squeezed a little because I remembered the well-meaning friend who had snapped her fingers at her, trying to "teach her to pray."

   I might have wanted to do that once. But no longer. During the past two years I, too, had been melted down by the almost unbelievable love of Christ Himself. I had dropped "techniques." And so, I could just sit there quietly and speak first to Him and then to her.

   "Lord, here she is. Will you break down this wall of resistance in her? You know what caused it in the first place. You know what she needs right now. We don't, but You do."

   Then to Marian I said, "Try just one word. Turn your whole being toward all you know of Christ and say His Name. Just say 'Jesus.' "

   The muscles in her face tightened. And then after a long minute a little tense, frightened voice said, "Jesus."

   I continued talking to Him quietly. Very, very quietly.

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   I longed to avoid any tone of voice or phrasing which might make Him seem remote to her. I knew He would cast out her fear if He had an opening. Aloud, so she could hear me, I asked Him to keep me sensitive to her as she was, at that minute there in that hotel room.

   And then we sat together during a long, long silence.

   My tendency has always been to talk too much, to try to communicate what I have discovered. His Love has overcome that tendency I now know, because I waited out the long anxious, moments with her in silence.

   A long, long time passed and then she spoke to Him.

   "Jesus . . . I ask You to break it down in me. Whatever it is."

   More silence.

   Then it occurred to me to ask her one simple question. "Marian, would you like to tell Him you love Him?"

   Her reply was an old familiar volley at me. The fear-pattern took over again. "But, do I love Him? I've tried, Genie. Honestly, I've tried, but I'm scared. I'm just plain scared, I-." She stopped the nervous chatter. Her voice changed suddenly from the rapid, hoarse frightened rat-tat-tat of almost meaningless words to a slow, hesitant, but suddenly quite childlike whisper.

   I shall never, never forget what she said to Him then.

   "Jesus? Jesus, are You listening? Well, if You are, I—I just want—." For a moment, I thought she might faint. But thank God, I kept quiet.

   The same childlike whisper, slowly, very, very fearfully." "Jesus? I—I just want to tell — You — I, do love You."

   And then we did nothing for another long time except sit there with Him.

   With you, in your own particular fear-trauma, there may be other words, other circumstances. But anyone, with a normal conscious mind, no matter how torn it is with fear and

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dread and anxiety, can make contact with the Person of Jesus Christ. Anyone. Anyone. Marian's conscious act of speaking to Him personally (not to me, to Him!) made the pinpoint opening which set His Spirit free to begin His miracle of healing in her subconscious mind.

   For years, her subconscious had been cluttered with the fears and dreads and anxieties which tortured and twisted her conscious mind. That night in that strange hotel room by His grace, through a direct answer to our request, she had ventured one simple act of contacting Him. She spoke to Him. She responded to Him. She told Him she loved Him!

   I doubt if she felt much love for Him as she spoke the words. But she spoke them. And the seemingly high locked gates to the recesses of her very being flew open!

   Her life is still full of trials and unsolved problems. Her physical condition is anything but good. But her letters now are a benediction to me as I write this book. She is talking much and freely to Jesus Himself now. And she is asking Him every day that He will be able to get through these words of mine to your heart, particularly if it is tormented with fear as hers was.

   As I see it, we make the opening through our conscious minds for Him to invade our tangled subconscious minds with the love that always, always heals whatever it touches.

   This dependable principle works whether your problem is fear, worry, pride, selfishness or self-deception.

   We must keep firmly in our conscious minds that neither our conscious nor our subconscious is a mystery to Christ. He knows. He created them both. "Without Him was not anything made that was made."

Chapter Five  ||  Table of Contents